A Heartfelt Letter to My Late Father: Reflecting on Lost Conversations and Unfulfilled Promises

It's been a tough journey, its exactly two semesters since I resumed school. I still remember the letter I once wrote for my dad, hoping to bridge the gap between us. Sadly, I never had the chance to give it to him before he passed away in February. As I navigate through my studies and life, I want to share this letter and the emotions behind it. Perhaps it will resonate with others who have experienced similar losses and struggles.

Dear Dad,

I hope this letter finds you well. It's been a long time since we've had a heart-to-heart conversation, and I think it's time we address some things that have been weighing heavily on my mind. I want to be honest with you about how your absence in my life has affected me.

From the moment I was born, I've longed for your presence and guidance. We've met a few times over the years, and each time, there were promises made about being a part of my life. I held on to those promises, hoping against hope that you would fulfil them. However, as the years passed, it became painfully clear that those promises were empty, leaving me feeling neglected and abandoned.

Seeing my friends having strong relationships with their fathers, witnessing them take an active role in their education, and being able to provide for their children's needs has been a source of great sadness for me. I've had to face the reality of not being able to pay my school fees, and as a result, I'm currently two semesters away from completing college. The uncertainty of whether the college will allow me to return hangs over me like a dark cloud. Seeing my classmates graduate without me really holds me down.

I'm on the brink of turning 21 in two months, and it's the first time in my life that I've felt so powerless and vulnerable. Time is slipping away, and without some form of intervention, my dreams of graduating from the University of Nairobi, the best in the land, seem increasingly out of reach. I worked tirelessly throughout my life to achieve this dream, but I had to drop out after just one year because it was painfully evident that I couldn't afford the school fees.

I'm sharing this with you not to assign blame but to make you aware of the profound impact your absence has had on my life. I still hope that it's not too late for us to establish a meaningful connection and for you to play a role in my life, especially when it comes to my education. I'm willing to work together with you to find a solution to this challenging situation, one that allows me to pursue my dreams and create a better future for myself.

Dad, please consider my words carefully. I believe in second chances and the possibility of reconciliation. Let's not allow the past to define our future. I look forward to hearing from you and working towards a brighter tomorrow.

Sincerely,

James Njoroge

As I reflect on this letter now, I realize how much I yearned for my dad's presence and support. His absence left a void that has profoundly shaped my journey. Despite the challenges, I am determined to continue pushing forward with my dreams and aspirations. The struggles I face today are part of the path I'm carving out for myself, and though it has been difficult, it has also made me more resilient.

Returning to school feels like a small victory amidst the chaos. While I still face financial uncertainties and the lingering pain of my dad's passing, I'm reminded that every step forward is progress. The support I've found in friends, mentors, and even strangers has been invaluable. Their encouragement fuels my drive to not just survive but thrive.

For anyone reading this who might be going through similar struggles, know that you're not alone. Life can be incredibly tough, and sometimes it feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. But it's in these moments of vulnerability that we find our true strength. Keep pushing forward, seek out support, and never give up on your dreams. Our stories, our pain, and our perseverance are what make us who we are.

Here's to a brighter tomorrow for all of us. 🌟